
Two things: 1. I am loving the dilly out of all these road trips! First the Big Three last week and now Beth and Zoe this week. (I am wondering though, did Randall pack the ladies “many pitted fruits?” Or did they behave as normal people do and eat crunchy, salty, chocolaty things?)
2. I, too, had a dad named Abe who died of lung cancer even though he was never a smoker. So yeah, this episode wrecked me, pretty much.
3. Okay I lied. I have THREE things to say. Susan Kelechi Watson is a genius. We’ve seen her do her stuff before, but this week she left nothing on the table. Someone give that woman an Emmy and a Golden Globe to go with it!
How about you? what did you think of the glorious (to me) Beth episode? I personally think it ranked up there this season, anyway, if not the entire series.
RECAP:
- We meet Beth’s fearsome mother, played by an always formidable Phylicia Rashad, in the hallways of the school at which she rules the roost as principal. She is a strict, no-nonsense teacher who does not suffer fools or, as it turns out, dreamers.
- Flashback: Too bad her youngest child, Bethany, is a dreamer, lost in a reverie of sketching ballet shoes and dancing ballet. As Beth’s dad says, their “little Island girl” could dance before she walked.
- Oh, how I adored Beth’s dad, Abe. With his sing
song-y Jamaican accent, gentle, loving nature and wonderful warmth, he won me over in seconds.
4. In the present, Beth and Zoe discuss their fears about “laying down the law” with their steely mother and aunt. “You’re gonna lay down the law with her, right?” Zoe asks Beth. “And not just lay down?” Uh oh. Sounds like there is a history there.
5. In the past, we have Goran Visnijic (E.R) playing young Beth’s Eastern European ballet teacher at an exclusive ballet school. We learn that Beth’s parents have agreed to scrape and work extra to pay for her tuition there, even though there are no guarantees she will ever be recruited past high school. But that’s the dream, and dreams die hard.
6. Fast forward to Beth’s senior year of high school, and indeed, her ballet teacher tries to tell her maybe she should cut her losses, or work 10 times harder. Beth chooses Plan B.
7. Beth’s beautiful dad has lung cancer, though he never smoked. “So unfair, right?” And I was bawling, remembering when I got the call that my dad had stage 4 lung cancer. SO unfair. When she hugs her dad after the announcement, the tenderness between them was palpable. Definitely one of my top Tissue Moments from this show.
8. Ugh! When it comes to grieving and guiding your children in grief, Beth’s mother is incompetent and foolish. She denies Beth the space she needs to mourn the father she loved. I mean, “dry those tears…?” Can I get an amen from all my social worker pals? This stiff upper lip stuff is total crap. But Beth’s mom is a woman with a plan and a script: work hard and you will succeed. Except when you don’t …
9. In a beautiful scene, Beth sees her dad’s old chair with his bead massage thing still draped over it. She flashes back to a conversation with him, when he told her she could dance before she walked. “That’s just who you are,” he says, plain and simple.
10. But life took her in another direction. “I’m gonna forget. I’m gonna forget that part of me,” she says to her dad. And then she cries. “I can’t be me without you.”
11. Beth finally confronts her mom for refusing to continue paying for ballet lessons after Beth didn’t get the solo. “You didn’t have to take that away from me,” Beth finally vents the old festering hurt. “There’s no air with you. No air to be sad. No air to fail.” (And therapists all over North America rejoiced!)
12. But the thing about air is you gotta have it from somewhere. Abe was the air and light for his wife, and Beth found someone like him to marry. Randall is her air, her dreamer. This trip to visit her mom has reconnected Beth to her dear dad, and to her childhood dream. She tells Randall that she knows what she wants to do with her life now (or should I say again?): Dance and teach dance. And return to being Abe’s little Island girl once again.
Holy Moly! I even cried writing the recap!
What a profound episode, don’t you think?
What did you want to be when you were young?
Did Beth’s story stir some long lost dream inside of you?
Comment below and we can all boo hoo together. Pass the Kleenex and get out your dancing shoes!
I think this was one of my favorite episodes ever. I don’t always cry, but when Beth sat down with her mom and told her, “There’s no air with you,” it brought me back to my relationship with my mom. I think what evoked tears was the longing I still have (my mom passed away 18 months ago) to have that difficult discussion with my mom. To tell her how I felt around her — like I could never please her. And then when Beth’s mom actually apologized! Oh my word! She apologized! I mouthed the words “Thenk you” along with Beth. Does that only happen on TV, because wow, what salve for the soul.
What struck me, though, as I thought about it, is that my mom struggled with mental illness, so she was not ABLE to own or explain why SHE didn’t have any air. As flight attendants instruct plane passengers, first put the oxygen mask on yourself before you try to put it on others. She didn’t have air, and couldn’t give it. And yet, she did her very best.
So yeah, when the show ended, I not only cried but I sobbed (at least six Kleenexes full). Grief from my childhood and from her passing felt like a Tsunami wave overwhelming me. But my longing was to just see her again.
Perhaps “This Is Us” was the therapy session I needed, so that I could release some of those stuffed-down feelings of loss. I still cried this morning as I described it to my husband, and he said, “Why do you watch shows that make you sad?” to which I responded, “My heart needed it.”
Thanks for listening. That probably sounded like a therapy session, too, but as a pastor I try to focus on helping others. 🙂
The thing that strikes me over and over is the brilliant casting in this show as they portray the characters at so many ages. I totally believe that the three main characters are themselves played by younger actors, and now they did it again with young Bethany. They captured Beth’s spirit, her look, even her eyes. If I didn’t buy into this, the show wouldn’t work for me. The only slightly weak link is Rebecca as an older woman, but I am slowly getting used to her.
When I travel, I love to munch on crunchy snacks: potato chips, peanut M&M’s and candy bars!
Aww, I’m sorry about your dad. 🙁 I loved Abe, what a sweet dad!
I was glad that Beth opened up about her feelings.
Oh my goodness, when I read Phylicia Rashad’s name, it dawned on me who she was. That bothered me through out the whole episode! I was like I know her!! I usually will Google an actor but I forgot!
I didn’t think that Beth’s mom would allow Beth to go to the Ballet school. She just seemed so hard!
I loved when Beth hugs her dad, I had a feeling that was going to be the last time she saw him!
I loved when Beth saw her dad’s empty chair and I cried when she said “I can’t be me without you.” Oh my goodness
It was sad a little bit when Beth aired out her feelings about her mom not having air! But the next day at breakfast when Beth’s mom explained her situation with her mom and how she met Abe. That broke my heart and when she said I am sorry, that was sweet! And Beth said thank you!!
I knew Beth wanted to teach ballet, that was her dream!